Karmic Metabolism

In the broadest of terms

Everyones got their own shit going on, all the way down to the fundamentals

We don't even know if my red is your red

If you extend this idea to the other internal aspects that make up a person

You realize how everybody is operating uniquely within their own existence

progressing through their daily lives

When I considered this I thought about religion and belief systems

When I was a kid in Catholic School,

I was taught that the system of Christianity was the true order for the whole world and always has been

I don't know if I ever truly believed that,

I mean every other religion believes that they practice the real true system,

there's no way I happened to choose the right one, I'm not that lucky

Is it possible that the systems we choose for ourselves are real to us but exclusively us?

I mean this in a capacity beyond faith;

that the extra-material aspects of every religion

are all materially true?

That Yahweh exist distinctly and simultaneously from Allah

in their own respective Heavens

but the belief systems they exist in can only impact those that choose to believe in them?

Why stop at established belief systems?

There's hundreds of different sects of every major belief,

there must be hundreds of simultaneous Gods,

hundreds of intangible systems all working at once,

adjusting and equalizing.

The Chrisitan truly is absolved of all his confessed wrong doings

simply by doing his penance prayers

Equally, the high school girl truly did manifest her well being and luxuries,

simply because she thought positively for long enough

and repeated enough mantras in the mirror every morning before school

I believe in Karma

If you were to read the wikipedia page for Karma

That's not the Karma I believe in

I tried to read that once and got overwhelmed by all the details,

Im attracted to the simplicity of when I first heard about it sometime in middle school

If you're good, the universe will be good to you

If you're bad, the universe will be bad to you

The universe treats you the way you are

And this occurs through cosmic coincidences that either make or ruin your day

That's what my belief system is

my middle school definition of karma

And its worthwhile to me because the incentive for being good is straightforward

Considering my opening remark about our exclusive belief systems

Given two people operating on karma, who's to say that they process karma the same way

In the way that everyone's internal systems are unique to them like

blood pressure, digestion, immune system, etc

It follows that the same should be true for external systems

The process for karma,

Karmic Metabolism if you will,

is the time the universe takes to react to the nature of your actions

If you've been an asshole, how long until the universe lets you know

by delaying your subway

Or collapsing a tree on your car

In my case, it's how quick

I've come to realize I have a high rate of Karmic Metabolism

So if I fuck up the universe is quick to let me know

Something that happened to me recently that I think demonstrates this

I tried to smoke a spliff during the middle of my shift at my grounds crew job

Because it's a lot of fun to get high and put on good music and “lock in” to weed whacking

Where we were working though was not an opportune place

This didn't stop me junkie fiend that I am

I found a slightly hidden spot in a brush

the best I could manage

and sparked up the spliff I rolled at lunch

premeditated being-a-shitty-employee

Usually I can manage the graba even when I over do it but on the third inhale I coughed real hard

And blew everything out of the paper, a whole joint wasted, my weed got whacked

The immediate “I shouldn't have been doing that, that's what I get” was followed by

Damn that shit happened immediately

If I had a slower k-metabolism

I could’ve finished smoking

and instead get pinged by pebbles kicked up from the weed whacker

All over my arms and face

a more than usual amount

I mean, I only blew out the weed cause it was creating bad karma,

If anyone else did that its cause they cant hang

Another time, during my last year of college

I got into it with my mom over the phone,

And given the nature of our relationship

there's rarely times I can argue with my mom and not be objectively wrong

If I wasn't already aware of that when I got off the phone with her,

it was made aware to me later that day

when I lost my neck warmer biking to my campus.

Given that it was around the time it was starting to get cold out

it seemed telling to lose that item specifically, or rather have it taken from me

It was a Christmas gift

from my mom.

Its coincidences like these that shouldn't be ignored

Since Im committed to my understanding of karma,

I think it's inevitable that I realized how fast it happens to me

But in the long run I think thats impacted for worse

On one hand, I've backed out from getting high on the clock on several occasions since

From fear of losing weed to universal retribution

And in general I've been making better, more well-meaning decisions

On the other hand, it restricts me.

Times where I'd make the lesser decision,

an occasional necessity, I have to pass it up,

from fear of how quickly I’ll reap what I've sown.

And I'm left with unanswered questions

Why do I have a high karmic metabolism?

Is it only because I believe I do,

that I've repeated this to myself so often that its accelerated my karma to strike near instantaneously?

What makes people have a high actual metabolism,

genetics?

I guess I'm just like that then,

yea my dad had fast karma I got it from him.

Maybe it's diet?

Is there a Karmic Diet?

Googling what I have to eat to slow down how quickly I receive universal punishment.

Recording of me reading.

Written for Ben’s fire reading, 10/27/24, the theme was punishment.

Thank you Ben for hosting and thanks Deb for recording.